for you

there's still a little bit of your taste in my mouth
there's still a little bit of you laced with my doubt
it's still a little hard to say what's going on

there's still a little bit of your ghost,your weakness
there's still a little bit of your face i havent kissed
you step a little closer each day
that i cant see what's going on

stones taught me to fly
love,it taught me to lie
life,it taught me to die
so it's not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball
damien rice - cannonball

hamster flu

i think my hamster caught my flu
my sister was feeding him water just now
then suddenly,picked him up
and he made a sneezing noise
and there was water all over my sister's hand
like mucus but more watery.
fuzzy, please get well.

there is this force like that of a hurricane
circling in on me
but not quite touching me.
in all directions,it's closing in
but i am helpless because i have no money.
the great singapore sale is driving me mad.

good day...bad day

went tanning at chai tea latte's house yesterday
just a teensy weensy bit burnt on my back now
but it was fun
made our own iced-tea, tuna overloaded sandwiches,
cut our own kiwis and strawberries
took bikini-babe photos
haha

but today wasnt such a good day
it's like a compromise or something
one bad day has to follow one good day
sigh
for one moment
i wished double espresso was around
i wish i could pick the phone up and call dbl esp
cuz i just needed someone to cry to...
munching on gingerbread men with yellow bow ties now

i think

somehow,everytime i meet up with mocha
i think.
not that i dont think on normal occasions
but i think more...
so today
i thought about a few things:
i thought about why i was upset
was it because i lost something
or because i truly loved it
and then i thought again
and i realised what i truly loved was not in what i just lost
then i wasn't so sad about what i lost anymore.
also,i thought about how we learn from our past r/ships
and carry them forward to the next one.
we find remnants...always.
also,i felt misunderstood
because i finally came to terms with my feelings
and i felt i was being judged based on what i used to feel
which i discovered was not the genuine expression.

my first R(21) movie...blown.

so i blew the special moment
of watching your first R(21) movie on
Inside Deep Throat.
i had no inkling whatsoever about the content of the show
all the poster said was
it was filmed in 6 days for 25 000 dollars
the government didn't want you to see it
it was banned in 23 states
it has grossed over 600 million dollars
and it is the most profitable film in motion picture history
so i went to the counter,asked the auntie
two tickets please?
(rudely)are u 21?
yep. and i took out my id.
urm... it's not a horror movie rite?
(GLARE)
so i shut up.still no idea what the show was abt.

when hazelnut latte n i stepped into the theatre
i noticed a pattern
sparsely spread around the theatre were OLD MEN.
so i thot,maybe old men just see R(21),then anyhow buy.
so we took our place n waited.
15 mins into the show,i turned and looked at hazelnut latte
and we both stood up and walked out.

the reviews in the papers about inside deep throat were quite good
but i just couldnt sit through a movie like that
i felt i was being slimed.

hazelnut latte was more upset about the wasted $8
i am still a little traumatized but more upset
although hazelnut latte tried to console me
said i didnt complete the show so it isnt counted.
sigh.
i hope so.

gloomsday conspiracy

today's weather is really depressing
it's one of those days u feel like everything's slowed down
everyone's walking at half their usual pace
there's nobody in the shops
the smiles on the sales people's faces are pasted on
and as u rest ur elbow on the table
the waitress comes from behind
and slams the leather case with ur change, in front of u.
when everything just feels so gloomy
you think
all i have to do is walk into a starbucks
order a nice warm caramel macchiato
and the first sip will bring a magical touch and
change everything back to normal.
then that first sip sucked.
it was a bad shot.
it's just one of those days.
tomorrow will be different.

preserve my mind

my mind is all i keep
all else tangible can be removed
but the preservation of my mind is most vital.
for in my mind lives the memories
that need no photographs or melodies,
fragrance or pretty places to remind me of.
i find solace there,
knowing they remain.